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Horoscopes

By: Donna Li

 


 

Aries (March 21 - April 19) : Love is in the air! But unfortunately so is the flu. Breathe at your own risk. Wear a mask and stay away from mouth - breathers.

 

Taurus (April 20 - May 20) You know that crush you have in your third period? The one you stare at every chance you get? Well guess what, they are also staring at you. So give it a shot and talk to them. It may blossom into a beautiful relationship or a friendship, which is just as beautiful.

 

Gemini (May 21 - June 20) Embarrassed yourself and now you think everyone is judging you? Dont. Hardly anyone saw or will even remember in the next hour so go on with your day. People only care about themselves and worry about their own personal problem, they don’t have time to think about your embarrassments.

 

Cancer (June 21 - July 22) Studied really hard for that test and still don’t think you’ll ace it? Stop stressing, relax, drink some water. You got this. And if you do end up bombing it, it’s not the end of the world. There are more important issues out there such as world peace.

 

Leo (July 23 - August 27) An opportunity is coming your way. If you don’t grab at it, it’ll be gone forever. You don’t want to regret it for the rest of your life so take a chance and just do it. If it ends up all wrong, at least you know you didn’t regret not taking that opportunity.

 

Virgo (August 28 - September 22) Don’t cry. This school year is almost over! Push through. Only a few more months of suffering and we’ll be out of here. February is basically like two days and then March will be here with spring break. Then it’s April and before you know it, we’re back on the beach tanning.

 

Libra (September 23 - October 22) Haven’t been feeling yourself lately? Free up the weekend to pamper yourself. Stay home, binge watch some Netflix. Eat all that junk food at home. Put on a face mask and nap. Or get together with some friends and do all of that with company.

 

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) Got beef with someone? Just be the bigger person and either leave it alone or apologize. In the end you’ll feel better and have no resentment. You’ll be glad you guys aren’t fighting anymore and it’s one less person you’ll have to hate in your life.

 

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21) Your friends throwing shade? Drop them. You don’t need negativity in your life. There are better people at school. Heck, you only need yourself. You are the only person who can bring yourself up or down.

 

Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) You think the whole world revolves around you huh? Well guess what, it does! If you don’t think you’re being treated the way you should be treated, do something about it. Find people who will treat you the way you want to be treated.


 

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18) Today is your lucky day! Buy a lottery ticket, do something bold. Whatever it is, good fortune is coming your way.


 

Pisces (February 19 - March 20 ) Life advice, don’t spend money on useless things. Debating if you reeeeally need it or if you reeealllly want it? The answer is no. If you have to second guess your decision, you most definitely have already made up your mind.

 

Joke

Dr. Frankenstein had been looking forward to the bodybuilding contest all week before realizing he was severely misunderstood the objective.